I’ve had just over a week of life ‘post work’ and I think I’m starting to get in the swing of it. My to do lists now consist of things like: do the washing (cold), decorate nursery, baby craft, buy maternity bra… All the things I’ve been busting to do in preparation for our precious baby, who I can’t wait to meet!
I have to admit though, mid last week I started to have a slight crisis. Did I leave work too early? Would I ever be able to be dedicated at work again? What do I say when people ask what I do now? Nursery decorator for the time being?
I’m sure many a woman and many a blogger has written about it before, the challenge a woman faces who likes work and also wants to be a wonderful mum. I remember reading about Betty Frieden at school and thinking she was a bit of a whiner. Just deal with it, I thought, of course you can’t spend time with your kids if you’re at work and vice versa. Little did the 16 year old version of me know that I too would be grappling with similar issues 10 years later.
I have to say that I have always wanted to be a Mum and I have always wanted to have a career. At school, I wanted to be someone who wore a suit and worked in the city. I wasn’t sure what that would look like, just that I wanted to be someone in a job like that.
Leaving work, albeit only for a year, really made me stop and think about what the future might look like. Knowing we love this baby more than anything, our priorities will always be split.
When and if our baby ever reads this post I hope they know how much they were wanted, how we have waited these past weeks to finally meet them. When I think about them and the miracle they are, everything else pales in comparison and I know it will work out.